Inner City Music-A Teacher's Journey

Sunday, October 2, 2011

What I Want vs. What They Need

Hello again friends and family!

So the teaching continues here in Philadelphia, and it is not getting any easier. As the school year continues, the students are resorting back to their old habits and it has been a struggle to manage classrooms and hallways. Last week, we had a financial advisor in the building that we meet with about our retirement plans. He told me Clymer Elementary was considered among colleagues the worst part of Philadelphia: "It was like walking into a mental institution!" So when I consider what we started with, I am pleased with the progress; however, there is still so much work to be done. Oh P.S., I broke up my first fight, which I heard makes it official that I am an inner city teacher. Yay for me...I think?

Although I have received a lot of positive feedback from administration, I still feel that I am at war with myself and my students. Please don't misunderstand this statement. I have built a great rapport with my students and I genuinely love them, but what they need is extremely different than what I want to give. Because of the demographics, I feel the need to be that "iron fist" teacher who commands the room in almost a fearful way. However, I only want to be an encouragement to my students and love them as innocently as Christ loves us. Over the past few weeks, I have felt a change in my demeanor with children and my tone in the classroom. From the schools perspective, I am really "flourishing" and making "great improvement," but is this what I want? I can tell you the answer is no, so I am at a loss. If I refuse to teach as the dictator, but it is what my students need to succeed, than neither my students nor I win. I like to think there is another way - a way to teach and manage by example and love. Isn't this the way Jesus taught his disciples? If Jesus came to this earth as a King or dictator, his message wouldn't have been well received. He instead came to earth as a gentle man who lead a life that was worthy to be followed. I wonder sometimes if I am a teacher worthy to be followed.

Below is a video from my third graders' first day singing in rounds. Next week we will use our solfege in rounds while playing ostinatos. We are making progress!!

Saturday, September 24, 2011

A Different World

Dear Friends and Family,

Well, we've been in Philadelphia for almost three months and I miss all of you every day. To say that our transition from the Midwest to the east coast has been a big change is the understatement of the year. Wow, everywhere we turn it has proven to be a much different world than Missouri. I wish you all could be here with us, experiencing every moment of our life together.

The location I teach has probably been the most drastic change. I've included a few pictures of the area that surround my school. I feel like I'm teaching in another country...a true culture shock.

This picture was taken just around the corner of the school.

I know for a fact three of my students live in the homes shown in this picture.

To say that this job is a challenge does not begin to describe how hard it has been. So many days I wake up and think, "Can I do this again today?" Every day is a new obstacle with few resources, many hurdles, and grim outcomes. However, all that aside, I have fallen in LOVE with my job. I am surrounded by the most talented teachers in America, and they force/require me to be Mrs. B at her best. (AKA Mrs. B on Steroids!!) Needless to say, I am not the best teacher in the building or the shining star who put a "little extra" into the job. I've never had to work so hard to stand out...but I'm still trying. A typical work day lasts anywhere from 10-14 hours at the school, plus work that I bring home. Yeah, I pretty much live at school.

So enough about how hard this job is and on to the reason I truly love it here...THE STUDENTS! They are amazing in so many ways. They are full of energy, sassy, and a handful to manage. Their test scores in all subjects are extremely low, to the point where it is almost unbelievable. During the first few weeks of school, all of our students were F&P tested (a reading test to predict their appropriate reading level). I have many students who are reading three grades below their current grade level. They've also been tested in other subject areas like math and the results are still astounding. This, of course, makes my teaching more difficult. I've become very passionate about integrating reading and math into the music room. Here are few of my favorite pictures I took for Back to School Night last week. Enjoy!